Happy, Sad, and Jetlagged

It's been a couple days or so since I've returned to the States. Still all so surreal, everything that's happened. Still adjusting back to reality here. And uh, still accidentally slipping in random Korean words in conversations....

Four months went by so fast. I can't believe it was only just three days ago that I was in my dormitory, writing goodybe cards to everyone, packing away everything. It was just another day in Seoul.

On my last day, I was waiting for the waterworks to come, all day long. I'm pretty good at not crying when saying goodbyes. I mean, no one really likes crying in general anyways, but I've always been the resilient type. Except at the movies...during those really sad scenes....but anyways.

I hardly every cry when I say goodbye, even if the others are crying in front of me. It's not that I'm emotionless. I just figure one set of tear shedding is enough.

Until the very last second, when the plane shook down the runway, ready to take off, my heart was shaking with it. And when the wheels left the ground, I looked out the window to hide my tear streaked face from the passenger beside me to capture in and engrain in my memory the city that is Seoul for the last time.

I'm very happy and feel very blessed and thankful for having the chance to go abroad. I'm very sad that I left quite soon, that one semester flew by so fast. I'm not that jetlagged now, but I honestly do think that a part of me couldn't leave Korea for good, and that's partly why I find it slightly difficult to settle back into this American life compared to when I return to Utah from California in between semesters on previous years.

It's been a long hard fight to get to where I am now, but it's been a good struggle. It's been worth it, and I see it though the people I've met and become closer to, the people I left behind but returned to. Just letting myself live for awhile, and seeing the art of life outside of art school. What an eye opener for self rediscovery.

I look forward to the day I return to Korea. A trip may not be the same as a studying abroad type thing, but I digress. It's probably advantageous to actually be fluent in Korean at some point soon. :)